Tales from Timmy's . . . Always Fresh

What follows is a collection of various posts that originally appeared on Facebook (with a little editing) all referring to time well spent at Timmy's while taking a break from house flipping.  Hope you enjoy...

June 15 at 3:31pm via Facebook for BlackBerry
What does it mean when you've been out of that freezing cold pool water for quite some time and your penis isn't unshrinking and, in fact, looks a little smaller?

June 24 at 9:01am via Facebook for BlackBerry
Our Father who art in Heaven, may our team play with clear minds, speed in their feet, and desire in their hearts. And no matter what happens today please don't make us look as bad as those f'ing French!

July 12 at 10:16pm

‎( . Y . ) ( . Y . ) ( . Y . ) ( . Y . ) ( . Y . ) ( . Y . )

Can't get enough!

July 29 at 2:48pm via Facebook for BlackBerry
Honestly...crackwhores gotta be the ugliest kind of whore there is. Anybody disagree?

August 4 at 3:22pm via Facebook for BlackBerry
I have just discovered what, in combination, has to be the fattest, laziest, most slow-witted, least attractive male-female couple in existence...and they procreated...twice! God have mercy on us all.

August 4 at 3:55pm via Facebook for BlackBerry
People really should stop buying tatoos 'on sale'.

August 7 at 1:58pm via Facebook for BlackBerry
I am just hoping that my current evacuation doesn't take my liver and kidneys with it! Why is it I can never remember the last time I ate corn and/or peanuts?

August 9 at 10:24am via Facebook for BlackBerry
I know I've made this observation before but, I have to state once again that wearing a t-shirt with skulls, flames, or skulls and flames on it does not a) make you a man and b) definitely does not make you tough.

August 10 at 8:16pm via Facebook for BlackBerry
"Cute" takes on a whole new meaning in East Hamilton.

August 10 at 8:24pm via Facebook for BlackBerry
Did you know that the weirdos at Tim Hortons come in shifts? The night shift is a lot creepier but not as loserly as the day shift.

August 25 at 1:35am via Facebook for BlackBerry
Surprisingly...customers at Timmies at 2 am are less classy than the ones at 2 pm.

The ones at 2pm don't intentionally mess up the Mens' room to the point where the Timmie's employee on duty walks in and exclaims, "Holy Shit!". I'm not sure if it was actually 'holy' or not but, by his expression and the movement of his head in a circular surveying motion, I think it's safe to assume that someone pinched 5 loaves and tried to feed the masses. Not sure if there was any fish.


September 23 at 3:03pm via Facebook for BlackBerry

Even the prettiest girls can be ruined by improperly proportioned eye spacing.

October 20 at 10:03pm

Another night without a wife sleeping in my bed with my two boys who will at some point either (a) kick me in the head, or (b) kick me in the nuts. Gotta love family :-)